I was looking through my old drafts and came upon this entry on love that I never posted. I think I wrote this over the summer but couldn’t bring myself to publish. Here it is:
My computer does weird things and it randomly opened up my MS notes that I had to write to the entire team for banquet. I skimmed over it all and stopped at my note to Jasen. I quote: “Last words of advice? Love fiercely and entirely. It’s always worth it in the end.”
I’ve been wanting to write an entry about love for a while now but always stopped short of approaching the topic because I’m pretty much peeling my innards out for examination. But as I’m falling in love, being loved, walking out on love, and giving love, I thank the universe that there is such a thing as love in existence. I’m a supporter of all things soul. Not soul, but soul. And love fucks that soul. Fucks it hard. I choose the word fuck purposely for all its meanings- love is so good, so addicting, but also just so fucked up. When in love, you get lost, entirely lost in someone else, soul to soul, heart to heart. And in that state, you forget how to function, you question how you’ve ever lived your life without this other individual, and you can’t even think about severing this tie. You lose you, you lose you, and for some fucked up weird reason, you love it. You want it. It’s really quite lovely.
